Teenage Vampires and a White Russian

Teenage Vampires and a White Russian
Season 5, Episode 9 Total Episode Count: 97

Air Date	January 4, 2018
Produced by	Chuck Lorre Carol Anne Miller Steven V. Silver Joe Bella Toti Levine Suzanne McCormack
Written by	Story by: Nick Bakay Alissa Neubauer Teleplay by: Sheldon Bull Anne Flett-Giordano Michael Shipley
Directed by	James Widdoes
Production Code	T12.15709
Length	19 Minutes
Episode Navigation
← Previous "An Epi-Pen and a Security Cat"	Next → "A Bear and a Bladder Infection"

Teenage Vampires and a White Russian is the ninth episode of Season 5 and the 97th episode of Mom.

Synopsis[]

Christy, Bonnie and Adam bail Ray out of jail after he calls Adam about being arrested for getting into a fight at a Warriors game.

Bonnie tries to force him to get sober and attend A.A. Meetings, but Ray insists that he gets cleaned up his way and stays with Adam.

Meanwhile, Christy fights for her job when her new boss isn't as forgiving regarding her lack of punctuality at work as her old one.

Title Meaning[]

(Teenage Vampires) Bonnie's subject in her young adult novel idea.

(A White Russian) The drink Geoffrey (Christy's new boss) orders at the bar where Adam hangs out.

Cast and Characters []

Main Cast[]

(*Characters/cast members crossed out are not present in this episode)

Anna Faris as Christy Plunkett
Allison Janney as Bonnie Plunkett
Mimi Kennedy as Marjorie Armstrong-Perugian
~~Jaime Pressly as Jill Kendall~~
Beth Hall as Wendy Harris
William Fichtner as Adam Janikowski

Guest Cast[]

Leonard Roberts as Ray Stabler
Matt Oberg as Geoffrey
Amir M. Korangy as Leo (credited as "Amir Korangy")
Brett Wagner as Frankie
Lyn Alicia Henderson as Susan
Nicola Lambo as Customer

Gallery[]

Images[]

Videos[]

Trivia[]

All Episodes of Mom
Season 1
Pilot • A Pee Stick and an Asian Raccoon • A Small Nervous Meltdown and a Misplaced Fork • Loathing and Tube Socks • Six Thousand Bootleg T-Shirts and a Prada Handbag • Abstinence and Pudding • Estrogen and a Hearty Breakfast • Big Sur and Strawberry Lube • Zombies and Cobb Salad • Belgian Waffles and Bathroom Privileges • Cotton Candy and Blended Fish • Corned Beef and Handcuffs • Hot Soup and Shingles • Leather Cribs and Medieval Rack • Fireballs and Bullet Holes • Nietzsche and a Beer Run • Jail, Jail and Japanese Porn • Sonograms and Tube Tops • Toilet Wine and the Earl of Sandwich • Clumsy Monkeys and a Tilted Uterus • Broken Dreams and Blocked Arteries • Smokey Taylor and a Deathbed Confession
Season 2
Hepatitis and Lemon Zest • Figgy Pudding and the Rapture • Chicken Nuggets and a Triple Homicide • Forged Resumes and the Recommended Dosage • Kimchi and a Monkey Playing Harmonica • Crazy Eyes and a Wet Brad Pitt • Soapy Eyes and a Clean Slate • Free Therapy and a Dead Lady's Yard Sale • Godzilla and a Sprig of Mint • Nudes and a Six-Day Cleanse • Three Smiles and an Unpainted Ceiling • Kitty Litter and a Class A Felony • Cheeseburger Salad and Jazz • Benito Poppins and a Warm Pumpkin • Turkey Meatballs and a Getaway Car • Dirty Money and a Women Named Mike • A Commemorative Coin and a Misshapen Head • Dropped Soap and a Big Guy on a Throne • Mashed Potatoes and a Little Nitrous • Sick Popes and a Red Ferrari • Patient Zero and the Chocolate Fountain • Fun Girl Stuff and Eternal Salvation
Season 3
Terrorists and Gingerbread • Thigh Gap and a Rack of Lamb • Mozzarella Sticks and a Gay Piano Bar • Sawdust and Brisket • A Pirate, Three Frogs and a Prince • Horny-Goggles and a Catered Intervention • Kreplach and a Tiny Tush • Snickerdoodle and a Nip Slip • My Little Pony and a Demerol Drip • Quaaludes and Crackerjack • Cinderella and a Drunk MacGyver • Diabetic Lesbians and a Blushing Bride • Sticky Hands and a Walk on the Wild Side • Death, Death, Death and a Bucket of Chicken • Nazi Zombies and a Two-Hundred Pound Baby • Cornflakes and the Hair of Three Men • Caperberries and a Glass Eye • Beast Mode and Old People Kissing • A Catheter and a Dipsy-Doodle • Pure Evil and a Free Piece of Cheesecake • Mahjong Sally and the Ecstasy • Atticus Finch and the Downtrodden
Season 4
High-Tops and Brown Jacket • Sword Fights and a Dominican Shortstop • Sparkling Water and Ba-dinkers • Curious George and the Big Red Nightmare • Blow and a Free McMuffin • Xanax and a Baby Duck • Cornbread and a Cashmere Onesie • Freckled Bananas and a Little Schwinn • Bad Hand and British Royalty • A Safe Word and a Rib Eye • Good Karma and the Big Weird • Wind Chimes and a Bottomless Pit of Sadness • A Bouncy Castle and an Aneurysm • Roast Chicken and a Funny Story • Night Swimmin' and an English Muffin • Martinis and a Sponge Bath • Black Mold and an Old Hot Dog • Tush Push and Some Radishes • Tantric Sex and the Sprouted Flute • A Cricket and a Hedge Made of Gold • A Few Things and a Hawaiian Funeral • Lockjaw and a Liquid Diet
Season 5
Twinkle Lights and Grandma Shoes • Fish Town and Too Many Thank You's • A Seafaring Ancestor and a Bloomin' Onion • Fancy Crackers and Giant Women • Poodle Fuzz and a Twinge of Jealousy • Smooth Jazz and a Weird Floaty Eye • Too Many Hippies and Huevos Rancheros • An Epi-Pen and a Security Cat • Teenage Vampires and a White Russian • A Bear and a Bladder Infection • Bert and Ernie and a Blessing of the People • Push-Down Coffee and a Working Turn Signal • Pudding and a Screen Door • Charlotte Brontë and a Backhoe • Esta Loca and a Little Klingon • Eight Cats and the Hat Show • Crazy Snakes and a Clog to the Head
Season 6
Pre-Washed Lettuce and a Mime • Go-Go Boots and a Butt Cushion • Ambulance Chasers and a Babbling Brook • Big Sauce and Coconut Water • Flying Monkeys and a Tank of Nitrous • Cottage Cheese and a Weird Buzz • Puzzle Club and a Closet Party • Jell-O Shots and the Truth about Santa • Pork Loin and a Beat Up Monte Carlo • Flamingos and a Dance-Based Exercise Class • Foot Powder and the Barrelworks Pirates • Hacky Sack and a Beautiful Experience • Big Floor Pillows and a Ball of Fire • Kalamazoo and a Bad Wedge of Brie • Sparkling Banter and a Failing Steel Town • Skippy and the Knowledge Hole • A Dark Closet and Therapy with Horses • Soup Town and a Little Blonde Mongoose • Lumbar Support and Old Pork • Triple Dip and an Overhand Grip • Finger Guns and a Beef Bourguignon • Crazy Hair and a Teeny Tiny Part of Canada
Season 7
Audrey Hepburn and a Jalapeño Popper • Pop Pop and a Puma • Goat Yogurt and Ample Parking • Twirly Flippy Men and a Dirty Bird • Fake Bacon and a Plan to Kill All of Us • Wile E. Coyote and a Possessed Doll • Pork Butt and a Mall Walker • Hot Butter and Toxic Narcissism • Tuna Florentine and a Clean Handoff • Higgledy-Piggledy and a Cat Show • One Tiny Incision and a Coffin Dress • Silly Frills and a Depressed Garden Gnome • Dammit Sandra and Viking Ancestors • Cheddar Cheese and a Squirrel Circus • Somebody's Grandmother and the A-List • Judy Garland and a Sexy Troll Doll • Beef Baloney Dan and a Sarcastic No • A Judgy Face and Your Grandma's Drawers • Texas Pete and a Parking Lot Carnival • Big Sad Eyes and an Antique Hot Dog
Season 8
Sex Bucket and the Grammar Police • Smitten Kitten and a Tiny Boo-Boo Error • Tang and a Safe Space for Everybody • Astronauts and Fat Trimmings • Sober Wizard and a Woodshop Workshop • Woo-Woo Lights and an Onside Kick • S'Mores and a Sadness Cocoon • Bloody Stumps and a Chemical Smell • Whip-Its and Emotionally Attuned Babies • Illegal Eels and the Cantaloupe Man • Strutting Peacock and Father O'Leary • Tiny Dancer and an Impromptu Picnic • Klondike-Five and a Secret Family • Endorphins and a Toasty Tushy • Vinyl Flooring and a Cartoon Bear • Scooby-Doo Checks and Salisbury Steak • A Community Hero and a Wide Turn • My Kinda People and the Big To-Do